Okami,Kuro (The Silver Wolf) WIP

[Kuro Okami]

I AIN’T SETTLING FOR JUST GETTING BY

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I’VE HAD ENOUGH SO-SO FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE[/CENTER][/size]

WE’RE ALL LOOKIN FOR A HAPPY ENDING

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EVERY DREAM OF WINNING[/center]

[/b]Kuro Okami
nicknames: The Silver Wolf
birthday: Feb 25
age: 15
status: Citizen
orientation likes girls
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GREW UP ON A TIGHTROPE, LEARNED TO SMILE

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EVEN WHEN I WAS FALLING DOWN[/center]

[/b] Permanently white, very spiky
eye color: Icy Blue
height and weight: 4 feet, 99 pounds
distinguishing features: He wears gear thats conpletely covered in silver paint, hence the title.They even glint in the light like actual silver. He wears shin-length combat shorts, a sleeveless jacket, a sleeveless shirt thats actualy white and not covered in silver paint , and a steel paintball mask, polished to a silverish gleam, and sliver painted combat boots.He wears silver fingerless combat gloves.His hair is Permanently bleached white. He also has a large scar from a silenced pistol on his side


face claim: Jermany Sumpter[/ul][/size][/blockquote]

OUT WHERE YOUR TROUBLES CAN‘T FIND YOU

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OUT WHERE YOU LEAVE THEM ALL BEHIND[/center]

[/b] fish, eggrolls, rootbeer, relaxing, having fun.
dislikes: SMILE, traitors,lairs, being called shorty, milk.
strengths: He's increbibly strongwilled. He was also taught how to fight with a Lazer Blade by his father, who taught Kuro everything he knew.
weaknesses:A little bit naive.He's also very stubborn. He likes to do things on his own, and he isnt good at mind tricks.
fears: That he can fail, dying before he completes his goals.
goals: Take down SMILE, avenge his parents.
personality overview: He's equal parts grim and carefree. He's had a rough time with it, but he can laugh and have fun with the best of them. Unfortuanilty,due to the fact his life was ruined by SMILE, he can lapse into a grim mood, where he just wants to be left alone.But,fortunately, those dont last long, and he's right back to pulling pranks and other fun things.

DEAR MOM AND DAD, I‘LL SEND MONEY

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I‘M SO RICH THAT IT AIN‘T FUNNY[/center]

[/b] Sakura Okami, Citizen,historian.(Dead)
father: Joe Okami, Citizen,Ex-soldier.(Dead)
siblings: None
others: None
hometown: Originally from a small town in Missouri, his family moved to London 6 years ago.
history:His parents meet in Missouri. His mother, a Japanese woman, and his father an ex soldier born in that state. They clicked, and were married, Joe taking his wife's last name. Along came Kuro. They raised him in Missouri for 9 years, and then moved to London 6 years ago,hoping to start new beginnings. About a year ago, SMILE killed his parents in front of him.Kuro took up his fathers Lazer Blade and went out to get revenge, adopting a new identity....THE SILVER WOLF! So far, the Wolf has struck only by by doing some lightweight theiving, but when he joins the Rebellion,watch out SMILE!
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JUST A HOMETOWNGUY

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BORN A ROLLING STONE[/center]

[/b]: Ake
rp experience: since middle of 2010
have you read the rules? yes
where did you find us? Paradise Pier rp[/ul][/size][/blockquote]

[SMILE Institutes]

There are a few problems that need to be addressed... You might want to get a cup of tea to read these with... You'll probably be finished by the time you stop reading these...

His eyes wouldn't be able to change colour.
Please delete the links.
There wouldn't be mutations. Everyone on this site are humans.
No one would be able to outrun a cheetah.
1) It's Better Living INDUSTRIES. As an My Chemical Romance fan, I am insulted that you got that wrong on the KillJoy site you had this character on before here. 2) BL/Ind aren't in this.
He wouldn't have been made by SMILE. They don't do that kind of thing.
As already said, he can't be mutated that much.
If he died, he died. An altered raygun would have probably blown a hole in his heart/wherever it was aimed at, so that wouldn't have been easy to fix... Probably near impossible.
A machine wouldn't save him, nor would it make him stronger.

Now for the misspellings.
'The* Silver Wolf'
'Permanently'*
'pounds'*
'that's'*
'completely'*
'hence'*
'like'*
'shin-length'*
'that's'*
'actually'*
'liars'*
'incredibly'*
'naive'*
'isn't'*
'laugh'*
'fortunately'*
'don't'*
'Originally'*
'full-blooded'* (though you could just say 'His Japanese mother')
'wife's'*
'the'*

Sorry that I've basically cut the whole thing up, but we do like to have things making sense and good spelling. Fix this stuff and tell us when you're done.

[Kuro Okami]

K, I edited it. Hope I got them all.

[SMILE Institutes]

Unfortunately, you're still pending. I really want to accept you, but you haven't deleted the links in your work. The 'read more: ...' links are still in place, which we asked to be removed.

Also, citizens aren't fond of SMILE. No one is, except SMILE. We get that, we get your character is pissed because of his history. But Citizens tend to stay away from SMILE, and not attack them. While this would be an awesome Rebel application, there's a ban on Rebels. Though we have said your character could merge into the rebellion at a later stage, a citizen is still a citizen. So we need to modify that a little. We're not going to trample all over your character, because we're not about stifling creativity. But citizens are wary of SMILE. So let's try something like..
'Kuro dislikes SMILE, enough so to rail up against the laws of the grim overlords. However, he's cautious about doing so, and is not as extreme as the rebels are.'
Just tone him down a bit, and when he eventually slides into the rebel group, he can be the most kickass rebel you could ever imagine. Within the boundaries of SMILE, of course.

[Kuro Okami]

K. And so no fighting?

[SMILE Institutes]

Finally, you have been accepted into SMILE. Make sure to post your face claim.

To answer your question, you could try and fight SMILE, but you'd be tortured. Rebels mostly manage to escape through experience - citizens do not have this experience. So you'd have less of a chance of escape and more of a chance of death.

Now that's over with, thread?

[Kuro Okami]

Hmm, k. Sure. Where Do you want me to post? Or do you wanna go first?